Somewhere along the way we’ve lost heart. We’ve lost a part of who we are. Was it due to a series of blows against our heart, or was there one traumatic event that crippled the desire to be beautiful?
“There is something fierce in the heart of a woman. Simply insult her children, her man or her best friend and you’ll get a taste of it. A woman is a warrior too. But she is meant to be a warrior in a uniquely feminine way. Sometime before the sorrows of life did their best to kill it in us, most young women wanted to be a part of something grand, something important. Before doubt and accusation take hold, most little girls sense that they have a vital role to play; they want to believe there is something in them that is needed and needed desperately”. Exert from ‘Captivating’ by John and Stasi Eldredge.
There is a woman in my life that I love very much, and I would like to share her story. To keep her privacy I will call her Elizabeth.
Elizabeth grew up believing herself to be less than those around her. She felt that her hair wasn’t the right color, and it was too frizzy. She believed that she had too many freckles; she was too skinny, and too tall. She actually had everything it took by appearance to be a super model, but she couldn’t see it. Elizabeth believed her sister was prettier than her, more popular than her and more loved than her. She believed her sister got all the guys, and had all the right friends. Elizabeth’s sister on the other hand, had always felt a need to have all the right friends, to strive for popularity out of her own feelings of lack and insufficiency. Elizabeth’s sister was actually told by a family member that Elizabeth was the prettier of the two sisters, only Elizabeth was never able to see it. We have an enemy who is fighting against our hearts to keep us from being who he knows we can be. The enemy of Elizabeth’s heart of course set up events in her life to cause her to feel like she had no beauty to offer. There were guys that Elizabeth liked as a teenager, and some of these guys of course liked her sister, thus convincing Elizabeth that she was not as pretty, that she was the ugly duckling. One of these guys was a boy that a friend had set her up with and they had talked a few times on the phone, and seemed to get a long. They decided to meet in person, and her sister was there also. Well this boy was about two or three inches shorter than her, and he actually had the gall to call the next day and rather than ask for Elizabeth he asked for her sister, and told her that Elizabeth was too tall for him. The sister wanted nothing to do with him, but never the less what kind of message do you think that spoke to Elizabeth’s heart. Elizabeth seemed to give up trying to be beautiful, decided it was easier to be plain. It seemed to be more difficult to make an attempt to offer her beauty only to be told that she had no beauty to give.
This is the story of a young girl who was truly beautiful, but because she believed the messages that she was receiving, too tall, too thin, wrong color hair, too many freckles… Elizabeth gave up; she gave up attempting to portray beauty, because she felt she had none to offer. There is a beauty in Elizabeth that goes beyond her outward appearance, she loves to help others. If there is anyone in need she will be the first to arrive to help without having to be asked.
There are many of us who, like Elizabeth, have felt that if we offer our beauty, or our true self it will be rejected so we just hide behind our facades. We hide behind who we think others want us to be, or we simply hide away without offering any part of our selves at all. What if we decided to just push past the fear of rejection; push past our insecurities and insufficiencies? If we push past everything that holds us back and simply live from our hearts what would it be like? I believe that every woman who makes the decision to live from her heart disregarding all those inner voices of fear and insufficiency will be truly a woman of true beauty, living a life of freedom and joy. She will have so much more to offer to the world around her, her friends, family and co-workers. Living from the heart free of fear, holding back no part of who you are, now that, is true beauty.
Look at the words to Bethany Dillon’s song ‘Beautiful”, I believe this is the longing of every young girl’s heart. Unfortunately by the time we’ve reached adulthood many of us have shut out that longing till we believe it no longer exists, or we resent it and believe it to be foolishness, weakness or immaturity.
“I want to be beautiful
And make you stand in awe
Look inside my heart
And be amazed
I want to hear you say
Who I am is quite enough
I just want to be worthy of love
And beautiful”
BETHANY DILLON, “BEAUTIFUL”
“Many of us have hardened our hearts to the desire to be beautiful. We too, have been hurt so deeply in this area that we no longer identify with, perhaps even resent, the longing. But it’s there, and it’s not just the desire for an outward beauty, but more-a desire to be captivating in the depths of who you are.” –Captivating
“There is something fierce in the heart of a woman. Simply insult her children, her man or her best friend and you’ll get a taste of it. A woman is a warrior too. But she is meant to be a warrior in a uniquely feminine way. Sometime before the sorrows of life did their best to kill it in us, most young women wanted to be a part of something grand, something important. Before doubt and accusation take hold, most little girls sense that they have a vital role to play; they want to believe there is something in them that is needed and needed desperately”. Exert from ‘Captivating’ by John and Stasi Eldredge.
There is a woman in my life that I love very much, and I would like to share her story. To keep her privacy I will call her Elizabeth.
Elizabeth grew up believing herself to be less than those around her. She felt that her hair wasn’t the right color, and it was too frizzy. She believed that she had too many freckles; she was too skinny, and too tall. She actually had everything it took by appearance to be a super model, but she couldn’t see it. Elizabeth believed her sister was prettier than her, more popular than her and more loved than her. She believed her sister got all the guys, and had all the right friends. Elizabeth’s sister on the other hand, had always felt a need to have all the right friends, to strive for popularity out of her own feelings of lack and insufficiency. Elizabeth’s sister was actually told by a family member that Elizabeth was the prettier of the two sisters, only Elizabeth was never able to see it. We have an enemy who is fighting against our hearts to keep us from being who he knows we can be. The enemy of Elizabeth’s heart of course set up events in her life to cause her to feel like she had no beauty to offer. There were guys that Elizabeth liked as a teenager, and some of these guys of course liked her sister, thus convincing Elizabeth that she was not as pretty, that she was the ugly duckling. One of these guys was a boy that a friend had set her up with and they had talked a few times on the phone, and seemed to get a long. They decided to meet in person, and her sister was there also. Well this boy was about two or three inches shorter than her, and he actually had the gall to call the next day and rather than ask for Elizabeth he asked for her sister, and told her that Elizabeth was too tall for him. The sister wanted nothing to do with him, but never the less what kind of message do you think that spoke to Elizabeth’s heart. Elizabeth seemed to give up trying to be beautiful, decided it was easier to be plain. It seemed to be more difficult to make an attempt to offer her beauty only to be told that she had no beauty to give.
This is the story of a young girl who was truly beautiful, but because she believed the messages that she was receiving, too tall, too thin, wrong color hair, too many freckles… Elizabeth gave up; she gave up attempting to portray beauty, because she felt she had none to offer. There is a beauty in Elizabeth that goes beyond her outward appearance, she loves to help others. If there is anyone in need she will be the first to arrive to help without having to be asked.
There are many of us who, like Elizabeth, have felt that if we offer our beauty, or our true self it will be rejected so we just hide behind our facades. We hide behind who we think others want us to be, or we simply hide away without offering any part of our selves at all. What if we decided to just push past the fear of rejection; push past our insecurities and insufficiencies? If we push past everything that holds us back and simply live from our hearts what would it be like? I believe that every woman who makes the decision to live from her heart disregarding all those inner voices of fear and insufficiency will be truly a woman of true beauty, living a life of freedom and joy. She will have so much more to offer to the world around her, her friends, family and co-workers. Living from the heart free of fear, holding back no part of who you are, now that, is true beauty.
Look at the words to Bethany Dillon’s song ‘Beautiful”, I believe this is the longing of every young girl’s heart. Unfortunately by the time we’ve reached adulthood many of us have shut out that longing till we believe it no longer exists, or we resent it and believe it to be foolishness, weakness or immaturity.
“I want to be beautiful
And make you stand in awe
Look inside my heart
And be amazed
I want to hear you say
Who I am is quite enough
I just want to be worthy of love
And beautiful”
BETHANY DILLON, “BEAUTIFUL”
“Many of us have hardened our hearts to the desire to be beautiful. We too, have been hurt so deeply in this area that we no longer identify with, perhaps even resent, the longing. But it’s there, and it’s not just the desire for an outward beauty, but more-a desire to be captivating in the depths of who you are.” –Captivating
I hope to stir up the desire that is in all of us to be the beauty of the story, to be captivating. If we can at least get back in touch with that desire it will be a beginning. Then we can move from there, and find ways to express the beauty that is in each one of us, the beauty that is on the inside and the outside as well. The beauty of the woman God created us to be.
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